I am 19f, have not been in education since I was 12. I'm looking for some support, advice or guidance..!

• my situation is, my mom is mentally ill, she has bipolar but always needed to be cared for by either a carer or family member, she wasn't really in a good place to guide me due to it all. And my father died just after I turned 13, it was hard and quite traumatic (he was diagnosed with cancer when I was 12) so for a couple of months, I basically watched him fade away and die. Along with that I carried guilt, because I felt so bad for my mom and other family members. For the following years it seemed normal staying home and education not really being a "priority. "

Also, I think a big factor was also this: the women in my culture usually don't stay in education after high-school, they stay home and eventually get married (the man provides) I wanted more than just that... And I didn't think too much about things, for some reason I always thought I'd be okay, I did think one day I'd get into something but I didn't exactly have a "plan"i just" knew" idk..!

I think it was just normal for me to not go because to alot of the people in my culture, I was used to all of that so it wasn't anything out of the blue. And I didn't have parents guiding me with these things. , It was "normal" (alot of the women in my culture get pulled out before high-school starts.) I don't agree with alot of it, in fact I don't want to live my life the way I'm "expected" but when I was younger I guess I didn't think much of some things because it was "normal" I still have understanding for the people who live that way (people from my culture, and some other people from other cultures seem similar, I guess it's just old fashioned and traditional). Luckily I was "different" and I didn't really become like most of them, I don't plan to marry into the culture either. I also don't feel like marriage is a necessity, all I know is, I want to fix my situation and get on the best path, and have some stability. And I want to become a hairstylist ASAP.

Long story short I am now worried about things and feel scared, I don't exactly know what to do to help myself, I did post months ago and I got support but I didn't go through with anything... I keep losing hope! I want to have some stability and hope that I'll be okay and that there is something for me. 🥺

I'd also like to add I'm 18,but 19 in 3 months.

Submitted February 04, 2024 at 11:08AM by beautyrosexo https://ift.tt/PWvRBpM