The American Public school system is broken, unregulated, and quite neglectful to the impact of students and teachers; of course depending on the school, state, or district.
I have finished the junior on High School in SW Houston, and it has been the toughest and the stressful year of my life. It has made me lose faith of the trust of my education with the American education system and of my own district.
I'm someone who has and still struggle with English and History, as memory-based learning was the hardest for me to learn; and I do believe I have ADHD but I haven't confirm it yet and am scared of the consequences for finding out if I am. This difficulty in learning isint sevear as I had it since elementary school, however I have seen that many teachers do not either understand or just ignore that every student learns drastically diffent than others. It a such a simple fact that I have undersrood with other classmates when I have helped them yet it still such an issue that makes students turn away to some or even all of education.
In the year, I have felt such repercussions of this neglect and it's impact has caused my future of education to decline:
Every year my schedule always had mistakes or changes that have cause some minor annoyance that has been fixed or accommodated. However in Junior year, such mistake couldn't be solved or changes into something more compatible, mainly due to school policies. For two of my morning classes, i was placed into two technology classes that were not needing for graduation, credit, or even discussed with me people. I understand that this is normal, however, I had enough credits to be a senior and did not needed any of the classes for graduation; what made it something more frustrating and difficult was that I'm not a technological person ( which has caused sevear stress and fatigue thought out the year) and that staff aid, a period where students can help deliver papers to teachers, are only available to seniors, which makes not sense if juniors, such as my self, are already ahead in credits.
With this annoyance set in place, it wasn't the main issue I faced. Mentioning about my struggle with English and History, I had them as advanced classes (history being dual credit ) back to back in the end of the day. It was difficult but not stressful, it was manageable and I honestly loved learning about some topics; and being in the end if the day has caused some issues but only was a small factor.
I must also note that my school has some issues with their food, specifically with their odd and sometimes inedible foods that they have served. This was more problematic as I have a really fast metabolism and their have been days where I couldn't eat and had sevear hunger pain from the morning to dismissal.
Now with these issues mentioned, I have discussed them with my counselors and teachers about how problematic they can be but provide nothing was ever changed. With all of these together, it became a hell of a year. It became to the point that: Wake up really early to catch the bus, eat little in breakfast and try my best to sleep in a loud environment, stress my morning with the techonology classes that I struggled to learn new topics Of, eat as much as I can try in lunch, and struggle with English and History as I'm already tired, stress, and hungry. It was such a chaotic and incompatible schudual that i felt so depressed at the end of 2018.
It was a time that I ignored anyone i knew ad much as could, avoided any interactions with teacher i had talked about my issues with, and felt so useless and just stupid that I couldn't manage high school. I hated my self. All I could see in my self was failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. I wanted to to cry and wished for some peace.
Luckily this lasted until spring break, where I had taken 4 days to evaluate and talk to my self about it. It gave my confidence to so well with the new semester and hopefully find a way to erase my pain. But nothing good came. I had began to lose all faith of my education due as my issues were not discuss about and something else about math I can discuss on later. I remembered lossing all feeling of worried about History, which was very odd as I nearly failed the previous semester. Nearly a month before the end of school, my daily struggle came back stronger as it was before, not out of my ability to learn, since I actually understood topics much better, but that i had mentally and physically fatigued myself in my works that has caused me work to be much harder to work on than ever.
What made me hate history was my teacher's lack of understanding to my situation, labeling it as laziness and jokes about it to me. It hurted, I felt like she was right and started to hate myself again. As finals came around, I new i wasn't able to pass her class, it was sometimes long gone.
Once school ended and I receive my grades, I passed all of my classes except the second half of history. I was devastated. I had revered failed a class and just felt awful about my self. Luckly I have since evaluated this year and came to just let go and juat look foward. Sadly being that it was a dual credit class, I currently can't enroll into college classes to advance in math or science and currently still feel distraught about.
This school year was awful. I only mentioned about how I mentally and physically state has degraded, however I had other issues besides it as AP exams, attempts to advance in math, my constant encounter with false promises to succeed. It was battlefield of defeat and maintaing my self.
As the outcome of This year still flows around my summer, I can't shake the feeling of other students who may have or are in a state similar or worse that me. It was so awful and depressing.
If you read this all, thank You. I wanted to share my struggled somewhere, even trying to write a "book" about It in more details, but with my struggle in reading, it isn't easy for me. I hope I made my story more clear and understandable, and If I haven't in some parts, I apologize. Thank y'all who read and hope for a wonderful day and life.
Submitted July 02, 2019 at 12:09PM by NameBlank00 https://ift.tt/2Nuk2EZ
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