Support for me

Hi everyone, I am in need of any inputs and advice here. Anything is welcome, even if you do not identify with my experience at all. I've been going through a lot but mind you, but I am indeed doing well. I am just someone who likes being candid about my experiences so I can empower myself.

If you have immigrant parents/an immigrant parent who didn't grow up in the same culture/environment as you did, and thus have never felt so close, do you try to do something about it? I'm asking just because I never felt close with my dad specifically for certain reasons, like all our conversations are very superficial, mostly due to the language gap between us in contrast to me and my mom. It's always been a quiet understanding since forever, but now that I'm 18+ in college it bothers me even more. It's frustrating because he is depressed from giving up his old life when I was born to come to canada and is isolated from his career as an online business worker, but he never makes any effort to talk to me (or my mom really) anymore. He is aging (late 50s), so I respect him and his needs, but if you're just waking up each and everyday just surviving, getting chores done, and helping me and my mom out with daily tasks for the sake of us being "your family", it's kind of toxic in a way. Like yeah biologically I am your daughter, but sometimes it's like he pretends that he knows me and what I am thinking about his behaviour despite knowing very superficial details about my life. Now you may be inclined to comment that I should then simply solve this by talking to him, with the help of my mom to translate, but it's not the case here. This has been going on for a long time, especially since all the holiday events where my mom has yelled at him numerous times about everything I just explained (so my mom is also on the same page as me here and is frustrated). I write this now because this happened again during dinner, where we were eating but then randomly in the meal my mom straight up tells my dad to talk and that the whole point of a dinner is to talk with each other as talking is what makes humans happy. Then seconds later when my mom steps out for awhile, my dad starts asking super basic questions about my life, some out of context, and while I responded like I would politely to anyone, it's really obvious how fake his intentions are. Like he is "rehearsing" from a script.I don't know. I just wanted to let this out because I'm already busy with a lot of things in m life so this is just annoying. I'm so thankful though, that I have so many amazing friends in my life, near or far, so I won't always feel alone. That growing up is actually really healthy for me because of things like this, as I can keep forging my own identity, following my passions like getting my dream job

Submitted February 27, 2021 at 12:44AM by HereIamstanding https://ift.tt/2NAYBTB