Is this normal? Telling my story

Hi there, I went through an experience in my first year teaching about a year ago that I just want thoughts on.

Last year after graduating with my undergrad I was hired on at a I would say below average district as a behavioral special Ed teacher. My students did also struggle with academics and could not access the regular curriculum. I will also note here that from the beginning the principal was speaking negatively about the last teacher in my role. Also worth noting that the previous year there had been 4 students and 2 paras, and this year there would be 3 students and 1 para. By November there were no more paras as they were moved to gen ed.

Anyway, I was given the unique learning system but no one else at my school was using it and when I asked my sped director who was also my mentor for help she just said that she didn’t know the curriculum. Additionally, there were behavior issues in my classroom and if a student bolted and I walkied for help (me being the only one in there with 3 kids) the principal got upset about it.

Additionally when I was observed the only feedback I got was that it was terrible. I think there is supposed to be a given time frame. During PT conferences I also learned that I am the third person in this role in 3 years. I was also given a new curriculum to figure out with little guidance and when I asked the sped director/my mentor for help she told me to figure it out like every other teacher.

Needless to say this was all having a large impact on my physical and mental health. I don’t like saying this but from the first day of orientation I was having diarrhea EVERY SINGLE morning before school. No exceptions. Only on school days. A couple months in I was crying the whole way to work and sobbing during my preps and lunch every day. By November I would become unresponsive to my family, just get home and sit and shake on the couch. Right before thanksgiving break, I could not even stand up when teaching because I felt physically sick at 22 years old.

Eventually right before thanksgiving I texted my dad from my school saying that I would harm myself if I did not go to the hospital that day. I finished the school day and my dad picked me up and brought me to a crisis center for an evaluation. I was in a crisis. The worker said that I have to take the day off (a Friday) and that’s what I did. I ended up going to the ER on the Sunday for mental health and they said I could not go back to work indefinitely due to my mental health, and said I needed to go inpatient or do a partial hospitalization program, which is what I ended up doing. When I sent my doctors note to the school, I was fired on the same day.

No one asked me how I was, if I was okay, they just fired me. And they said that they were going to do it if I was “sick” or not. After this experience, I did complete a hospitalization program and began looking for jobs again in late December/january. I applied for many different kinds of things, like museums and in home therapy and schools. I got around 5 offers, one being from a middle school wanting me to be a sped teacher.

I ended up becoming a building sub at a high end district in my area and took over a maternity leave for a 4th grade teacher. I am still at my school as a building sub while I’m in grad school for mental health counseling and I have to say I am a favorite at my school. No one knows what happened at the previous school, I didn’t put it on my resume, but I wanted to share my story and see if anyone else went through something similar and whether this is commonplace.

Submitted December 29, 2024 at 08:24AM by GroundbreakingPear12 https://ift.tt/9LdS7s5